Sparkles of Wisdom for Getting Along

I'm gonna go out on a limb, here, and share some sparkles of wisdom for getting along with family members (and people in general) that in my maturity have been very helpful in allowing me to avoid some social snares or blunders of my youth.

Let's face it.  There are lots of different personalities in the world, and the variety makes life interesting and colorful, but we are not going to delight in every one all the time!  Sometimes we are going to have a hard time dealing with certain personalities or certain comments.  I am not offering the following as blanket advice that would be the sum total of what you need to know.  I am sharing that these sparkles of wisdom have been MOST USEFUL to ME as I try to navigate the waters of family dynamics to the peaceful shores, and it is also invaluable as applied to other relationships.

1) Be polite and Kind. 

 Let that mantra guide you!  It's simple.  "Thank you to my friend Jean O'Malley, beautiful old school, for teaching me this," and, "I know Mom.  No one did more to teach me the value of good manners, than YOU, and being polite and kind is supposed to be the purpose of good manners."  Thank you to Mom also, for teaching me this.  It's really from the Bible:

Luke 6:31  Do to others as you would have them do to you.

Just measure your words and actions against that simple standard, before you speak or act.  Ask yourself, "Is it polite?  Is it kind?"  If yes, then fine.  You're good.

Now, problem is, even living by this, problems will come up.  You will face temptation to say something or do something that will not serve a KIND or polite purpose.  In such cases, it has been helpful to me, to learn how to "put it in a box."

My second sparkle of wisdom for promoting (and preserving) good relationships is to learn how to "put it in a box."

2) Put it in a box, on a shelf, and leave it there.

James 3, and Proverbs of the Holy Bible speak a lot about the tongue, and Isaiah 30:15 admonishes:

In quietness and confidence shall be your strength.

Always consider the option to just "be quiet about it!"

I have literally had an incident come up, that made me fume, seething mad.  I considered all that I could say, and had 0% faith or expectation that any communication on this matter would HELP, and 100% confidence that this was going to be a blow-up with hurt feelings resulting if I addressed this topic openly and honestly from my perspective, so I said, "We are going to put this in a box, on a shelf, and never speak of it again..... because all I want to do is love you and honor you."

It ended fine and well, and we haven't spoken of it since.  When the issue comes up even from someone else opening the backdoor, I do not comment unless I can make a positive, encouraging statement or response (turn their negative into a positive.)

I know, this is (let's be frank) "women talk."  Men live on a different plane than we do, and wouldn't care, don't care about half the stuff we women care about and vice versa, but as sweet as we try to be, it's not always easy for all the cats to get along.

(✰Ephesians 4: 29 Let no corrupt word come out of your mouth, but that which is good for edifying, and ministering of grace to the hearers)

Those are my two main sparkles of relationship wisdom.  What are yours??  I would enjoy reading about YOURS in comments, and would love if you added scripture💙 

copy right Tammy Dunlap 2017 <Tammy Dunlap's Permissions Policy>

Empty Nest

A cool cat, I am not.  A mother or grannie who wants her coffee, I AM.

At such quiet coffee breaks, I may contemplate: Empty nest is approaching, whether I like it or not.  On days that my daughter is away with friends or involved in a school function, and I am alone..............................I miss her.  I am lonely.  What AM I GOING TO DO??

Well, after the eternal list of living maintenance chores (cooking, shopping, cleaning etc.), I am looking forward to:

1) adding to my garden each year.  This year, I will add roses, and "more potatoes."  I am reasonable.

2) Eventually getting the clutter cleared out, and re-purposing my son's bedroom, but at the same time providing for comfy  accommodations for him and his family (whose visits are my delight.)

3) I want to paint or treat my front porch deck.  I am so happy in June, July, and August to have time off to catch up on home projects.

4) Work on my blogging, and add pages about one of my long time loves:  BOOKS.

5) In general, I am on a journey to increase my understanding, and skills in regards to this exciting media called internet.

Got any advice to share, or sources to recommend, or your own to-do list?  I would enjoy reading your comments.
Enjoy your coffee time, and thanks for the visiting.💙☕

Spring is in the Air

Spring is in the air!  There is no artist that is as awesome as the creator!

It is spring in the air, in plants, and my mind and heart as well, as I savor beauty around me, dream of ideas to discover, skills to hone, crafts to accomplish, celebrations to relish, (mmm recipes to share), and best of all, I nurture and hope for love to GROW in my family, as God is growing these beautiful flowers......................

This blog is a place where I will document and share some of my journey savoring, successes, sagacity, and sensibilities, as I alone venture and share, or my daughter with me.  I am growing in to my retirement years (could be two years away), and embracing being a new mother-in-law- and love, at the same time I am grandmother to a precious preschooler, and mother to an amazing teen ( come June), my Cherish, and also I am daughter to two treasures that are my Mom and Dad.  These relationships and times, bring rich blessings, trying challenges, and always I have HOPE because of my Lord.  Bible and faith are my foundation.